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| Thanksgiving 2006, or The Night We Became an Item |
When we met, we didn't intend to even really be exclusive. We were just looking for... well, honesty, for one. For someone we could get used to dating again with. We met on October 30th, 2006. The night before Halloween, the night after his 25th birthday.
Now, I want y'all to look at the picture above. Go on now, I'm waiting... You see that caption? The one that says Thanksgiving? Yeah, we threw all that non-exclusive, dipping our toes back in the water nonsense right out the window. The car window, that is. Going about, oh, I don't know, 50 mph.
It all happened so fast. He was such a gentleman (or so I thought!) and really made me laugh. He cared deeply about his family and friends. He was a hard worker, and, damn... did I EVER find him
He took me to meet his friends. All at once. Not just friends, either... people he had gone to high school, then college with, and then subsequently transported all of them out to where we live now with him. He made me let him buy things. Ate every meal I cooked for him (**swoon**).
He didn't make a move, at all. I held his hand. I kissed him. I was the forward-momentum. Yet we both felt it. That spark, I mean. You know the one. Where you're not sure exactly what it is, but it's something, and by golly it's something special. Over the course of 5 weeks, we fell in love and realized that it didn't matter how or when, we were going to be together for the rest of our lives.
We didn't say it, not at first. We each refused to be the first one to say those three words. We'd look at each other and grin up a storm, though. We got to the point where we had this... this nod. We knew what it meant. It was an understanding, that we got the feeling. That it was mutual. But still, we played chicken with the vocabulary. It was awesome.
I don't remember who said it first, or when. Which, in a way, saddens me. It hasn't even been 4 years since we've met and I can't remember that? Maybe he can remind me. I remember the sheer joy of it, though. I mean, yeah, we had the nod. I knew that much. But nothing compares to the words, the publicizing of those emotions, right? So, we were in love.
love-a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person
2 comments:
My parents got married about 8 months after they met and they've been married something like 54 years now.
The worldly idea of long engagements and "cohabitation" to try out compatibility does not really work. The statistics bear it out, too.
You can't try out the life-long lasting commitment of marriage without just jumping in and doing it. And the doing it is not just the effort of the two, it's requires drawing on the grace God gives especially to married couples to make it work. They just have to stick to the original commitment.
Love is a decision to do the right thing, whether it feels good or not at the time. True love will continue to make the decision as the feeling comes and goes, and it will, ultimately come and go. But in sticking it out, over time, the feeling can be fostered and the go time goes down while the good time increases.
She doesn't remember who said it first! --- ok I can't even feign indignance because of all the things I forget... but it's going to be nice to be the one who remembers something for once.
I'm the husband, by the way, ready to relate the story of the first "I Love You" said outright, by our new favorite mommyblogger.
We weren't officially living together yet, but her computer was set up in my living room floor, and she was set up in front of it doing internet stuff. Probably Facebook =)
I was in the kitchen slaving over a hot... dishwasher, while enjoying some playful banter with my girlfriend (the mommyblogger again, of course) when she says, "I love you, I can't not say it anymore. I've fallen in love with you and you don't have to say it back, I don't want you to feel pressured, but I love you."
To say it moved me is an understatement, emotionally at least... to say it moved me physically is pretty accurate. I walked across the living room, sat down on the floor, looked her in the eyes and said "I love you too, I have for a while."
It got super-mushy from that point on and I'm far too masculine and macho to go into it. But suffice to say that she said it first and I'm glad she said it. I love this woman.
-P
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